Athlete's dad files suit over penalty

[soyouthinkyoucanwrestle]

what i hate about this thread so far is how terrible certain people are making him look. he smoked a cigarette? honestly, big deal. yes, he broke the rules but he was off campus so that is pretty shady in terms of punishment. and i bet for a majority of the people rippn him appart for breaking the law, theyve done worse. he's still in high school no matter what he's ranked so lets treat him that way. think a little bit and give him some respect.

[greatt slambino]

Originally Posted by stillwrestling

Why does anyone think I advocate smoking?

Why does anyone think that kicking a kid out of a sport that requires fitness and limiting his sports scholarship options keeps him from smoking?

My comments are solely about rethinking whether rules and toughness are how to change behavior that is destructive.

I agree with your train of thought. My parents used the foot up the butt approach and had no clue that I was a teenage alcoholic. I felt I could not ask for help even if I wanted to. I don't know one person who would have stopped doing something they wanted to do just because mommy and daddy threatened them. Addictions are horrible things and fear isn't a reason not to use but a reason to abuse.

[agdfan]

Originally Posted by stillwrestling

Why does anyone think that kicking a kid out of a sport that requires fitness and limiting his sports scholarship options keeps him from smoking?

My comments are solely about rethinking whether rules and toughness are how to change behavior that is destructive. I don't recommend anyone smoke. Kicking this kid out of wrestling isn't going to make it more likely he won't light up in the future.

This policy of three strikes apparently doesn't deter even star athletes with huge scholarships on the line from smoking five feet from the school parking lot either. How about reading the writing on the wall and rethinking this approach?

Just curious, if not kicking a kid out for smoking didn't work (which obviously it didn't) and you don't think kicking him out will work, what other approach is there? Apparently addiction classes or something along those lines were also attempted. I am being serious...what else is there???

[Cubs84]

Originally Posted by agdfan

Just curious, if not kicking a kid out for smoking didn't work (which obviously it didn't) and you don't think kicking him out will work, what other approach is there? Apparently addiction classes or something along those lines were also attempted. I am being serious...what else is there???

when he was little and his dad made him smoke the whole pack and it got him real sick. He never smoked again

[flyonthewall]

Originally Posted by agdfan

Wow. I just read all 10 pages of this debate. I feel for this family. I cannot imagine missing my son's senior year, BUT, if this were my son, and it were only his first offense, let alone 3rd, you're darn right I would hire an attorney and sue the pants off MY SON for mental anguish. That would be after he managed to get my foot out of his butt. Where is the dedication, discipline, determination, all the many character building blocks we talk about that are instilled in our great sport? You know what? You play, you pay. That is a fact of life and it doesn't end in high school.

If anybody can get anything from life is to expierence the love between you two at state. Luke is 18, Im sorry putting foot in his butt is really not right if it is to be before or after. I think the parents thought there kid was doing great in life (it does seem like that?) its really hard to say bust him when you are proud of him for so many things. This is the hardest thing to being a parent to put things in perspective were does that line go. The good against the bad.

I beleive his parents want the best for him and truefully it is up to them to fight. I do not beleive the fight is not a good fight at this point, and the time most spent would be better in putting him towards getting set towards his future!

What really sucks for parents is that sometimes that is no matter how much you try to raise them the best you can. Some were when they get there minds they find things you wish they did not.

Its all a bummer in this case because its his life thats being put in front of everyone anyway i feel sorry also for the family and i guess i should be glad that its not mine!

[mom@125]

Originally Posted by wagon0619

There is a law, and its called the code of conduct. Both the kid and the parents had to read and SIGN it for him to compete, so he knew exactly what was coming.

The code of conduct that both my son, husband and I each had to sign before our son could participate in sports went as far as stating they would stay away from drinking and smoking PERIOD...on or off school grounds. Not to mention the fact that they have to have regulation haircuts. If they are even caught with a picture of themselves on myspace drinking, or smoking it is reason enough to sit out part of the season. In the code it is pointed out that these boys/girls have the PRIVILEGE of representing the school for which they are playing sports. They know the rules...if they choose not to follow them, the school may choose not to let them participate. Seems pretty simple.

[HardCore]

How else would you do it? Unfortunately we live in a society where we need rules and guidelines for all of the losers out there who don't seem to know the difference between right and wrong! It would be great to let a kid go to the bathroom without asking, but what do you do about the idiot who goes to the bathroom to sell drugs, sexually assault someone, get in a fight, vandalize the school or any of the other stupid things that kids do when they are unattended?! It would be nice to live in your fantasy land, but unfortunately, we live in the real world where rules and guidelines are needed for all of the idiots of the world. I am also a teacher and am married to one, I can't imagine teaching in a school that didn't have rules...it would be one heck of a free-for-all!

[ZBCOACH]

Why are we still arguing over this? He broke the rules and he got punished. When you sign that contract and agree to participate in athletic program you agree to their rules. If it says you can't smoke then you can't smoke simple and plain. I'm sure after the first two punishments someone had to know what the final consequence would be. I don't understand parents condoning their kids breaking the rules. He got a scholarship so what are the damages? He won't compete his senior year, he should have thought about it before he lit up.

[stillwrestling]

You got me there. All I can say is that many years of teaching have taught me that I do not control the behavior of my students. All I can hope for is to influence kids positively. If they respect their parents, teachers, coach, etc., then you have a chance to influence them.

The only thing that'll keep Lucas Roth from smoking and other kids from starting is a little honesty. Maybe if kids were respected more they'd respect us when we tell them honestly that it is huge mistake to start smoking, that it can ruin your scholarship and even kill you.

I once observed a high school counselor tell a freshman girl who cut my class to go to McDonald's across the street that she was a prime target for a sexual predator. No wonder these kids don't believe us when we tell them they are in danger or ruining their future. Adults in a high school simply lie to them too often about this stuff to be taken seriously.

Sorry if I offended anyone. I do feel how frustrating these issues are for everyone involved.

[agdfan]

Originally Posted by flyonthewall

If anybody can get anything from life is to expierence the love between you two at state. Luke is 18, Im sorry putting foot in his butt is really not right if it is to be before or after. I think the parents thought there kid was doing great in life (it does seem like that?) its really hard to say bust him when you are proud of him for so many things. This is the hardest thing to being a parent to put things in perspective were does that line go. The good against the bad.

I beleive his parents want the best for him and truefully it is up to them to fight. I do not beleive the fight is not a good fight at this point, and the time most spent would be better in putting him towards getting set towards his future!

What really sucks for parents is that sometimes that is no matter how much you try to raise them the best you can. Some were when they get there minds they find things you wish they did not.

Its all a bummer in this case because its his life thats being put in front of everyone anyway i feel sorry also for the family and i guess i should be glad that its not mine!

I am so flattered with your first sentence. I do love my son and I would lay down my life for him and I think he would do the same for me. I know very well that raising kids is a tough job...the toughest. I have 3 children. All were raised with the same rules, same discipline, etc...and all 3 are so very different. I am not singling out Lucas or his family. If this conversation were about anybody, I would be taking the same stance, as hard as it would be, even if it were my son. (I actually turned my older son into his coach for breaking a similar rule in high school) My heart actually breaks for them all, and I can't imagine going through this. But enough is enough and maybe energy would be better focused on the problem at hand rather than sports. I admit, I smoke. I hate it. I started at the age of 24 and I sure wish somebody, anybody would have done whatever it would have taken to have made me quit way back then...I was an athlete is high school and we had these rules in place, actually more strict back then, and the thought of getting kicked off was absolutely enough to keep me on the straight and narrow...Please don't think I am attacking the Roth's. I'm not. Just society's way of not taking responsibility for actions and really addressing problems at hand. (also, just to set the record straight, "foot out of his butt" was a definite figure of speech)